Horrorscopes: Nov. 15- Nov. 21
Wish I could’ve helped you last week. Really, do you even take my predictions seriously?
November 16, 2015
Horrorscopes: Nov. 8- Nov. 14
I can’t believe you still come here… It’s not like you follow my advice.
November 8, 2015
Horrorscopes: Nov. 1- Nov. 7
That mole looks cancerous, my friend. Perhaps you’d like Dr. Sham’s Arsenicum Tincture? Only twenty dollars.
November 1, 2015
Horrorscopes: October 25 – October 31
You should really stop drinking soda. I don’t have to be a prophet to see this one coming.
October 26, 2015
Horrorscopes: October 18 – October 24
I’ve been watching the birds for your destiny.
October 19, 2015
Horrorscopes: October 11 – October 17
You cannot keep coming back to me only when you need me. I’m trying to run a business here.
October 11, 2015
Horrorscopes: October 4 – October 10
“That’s twenty dollars plus tax. Don’t cheat me here.”
October 5, 2015
Horrorscopes: September 27 – October 3
“Only resigning early will truly set you free, my friend.”
September 27, 2015
